Deep Cover
by hijinx400
Summary: Vaughn's marriage is an assignment. PostEp 3.12 Crossings
1. Secrets Between Friends

**Chapter 1:** Secrets Between Friends  
  
Phone rings.  
  
"This is Weiss."  
  
"You answer your home phone like that? Leave it at work, man."  
  
"So, Mike, you just calling me at home because you miss your whup-boy or does this call have a point?"  
  
"Down boy! Actually, I need a favor from you."  
  
"I've got a bad feeling about this…"  
  
"I need you to check on Syd for me."  
  
"Bingo. I knew I was in for it. What's going on with Sydney and why are you acting like her handler again?"  
  
"I'm not acting like her handler, but we are partners and we do go on missions together, if you hadn't noticed!"  
  
"Does this have anything to do with North Korea?"  
  
"Well…"  
  
"Wait – I read part of your debrief. You guys were beaten and put in front of a firing squad. You think she needs to see Barnett for some post-traumatic stuff?"  
  
"Weiss, Syd faces near death experiences on a regular basis. The girl eats trauma for breakfast. She's the queen of compartmentalizing. This isn't about that…exactly."  
  
"Hold on…you didn't do something idiotic, like say, SPILL YOUR TRUE FEELINGS to her while facing your imminent demise, did you?  
  
Silence.  
  
"Oh man…."  
  
"Weiss, listen to me…"  
  
"Oh man, oh man, oh man! You're going to screw up _everything_ – her life, your life – YOUR DEEP COVER ASSIGNMENT! Kendall's going to kick your ass!"  
  
"I got it, Eric! First off, I didn't exactly verbalize my true feelings to Syd. Secondly, I did not bust my cover, so there will be no bald guys kicking my ass anytime soon."  
  
"Like you two ever needed WORDS to express your feelings! All you two have to do is lock eyes and anyone in a five-mile radius gets a jolt from the electricity."  
  
"Weiss, you're not helping me here."  
  
"Fine, fine. What mess did you get yourself into and how do you expect me to clean it up? Spill it."  
  
"We thought we were going to _die_, man! I couldn't let her die…_again_…without letting her know the truth. But she wouldn't let me say the words. She just told me she knew and then…we kissed."  
  
"Your ass is grass."  
  
"Thank you. Your support is overwhelming."  
  
"Come on, Mike. That is not a flood gate that you should be opening right now. I know your situation sucks in a big way, but…"  
  
"But, nothing. You can't make me regret what happened. As sick and twisted as it may sound, I'm thankful that for that one brief moment I could drop my cover with her."  
  
"I know what you're saying. But _everything_ you've done for the past year and a half has been for Sydney. She may not know it, but one day she will. You've come too far to blow it all now."  
  
"I took this assignment to seek _revenge_, Eric. If I had known she was still alive…I never would have gone through with it."  
  
"Mike, you're still getting revenge, man. You're getting revenge and serving your country."  
  
"While putting the woman I love through hell!"  
  
"She'll understand. One day, she'll understand."  
  
"I just hope you're right. Listen, after we got rescued, we didn't speak a word to each other. Once we got back to JTF, I had to slip back into my role of 'doting husband'. I know Syd saw me with Lauren. Thankfully, her dad was there and took her home. I just need you to go see her. She trusts you. Maybe she'll open up to you."  
  
"Okay, I'll stop by and make sure she's not drinking tequila and bedding some random guy…."  
  
"WEISS!"  
  
"Just kidding! Geez, sensitive much? Anyway, if she feels like talking, I'll listen. But you need to know that I care about Sydney, too. I'm not going to tell you what she says just so you can live vicariously through me. You need to step away and get your head back in the game."  
  
"I know, I know. I appreciate your help."  
  
"Just call me Dr. Phil, except with more hair. Of course, Kendall would shoot you dead if he knew you'd blown your cover to me already."  
  
"He knows. I actually asked permission after Sydney resurfaced. He knew I was in danger of spontaneously combusting, so he let me tell you. He knew I'd need someone to talk to."  
  
"The man is a prince."  
  
"Yeah, right. Just go check on her, then call me back."  
  
"No problem."  
  
Click.


	2. Friends & Neighbors

**Chapter 2**: Friends & Neighbors  
  
Knock. Knock.  
  
Sydney gets up from the couch, then hesitates wondering whether or not she should hide the evidence of what she's been doing. She then laughs to herself, realizing every person in her life is a spy – any one of them would figure it out regardless.  
  
"There's no privacy in the life of a spy," she mutters as she heads over to answer the door. She peers through the peephole, then smiles and opens the door.  
  
"Weiss."  
  
"Hey baby! Can I come in?"  
  
"Sure." Sydney moves aside and wanders back over to the couch. Weiss follows and notices an almost empty bottle of tequila on the coffee table, along with a salt shaker, numerous used up limes, and a vat of coffee ice cream.  
  
"Looks like I missed quite a party."  
  
" ' Beware the grieving man and his bottle…,'" Sydney says as she plops down on the couch and pours another glass.  
  
"What? You're not a man. Wait…you don't have some random guy hidden here somewhere, do ya?" Weiss glances back towards the darkened hallway, halfway expecting to see someone.  
  
Sydney gives him a throaty laugh.  
  
"No…no random guy. No guy period. I was just remembering something someone said to me once. It seemed appropriate."  
  
Weiss sits on the other side of the couch and takes the shot glass from Sydney. With a quick flick of the wrist, he down it in one gulp, then places the glass on the table. Leaning back against the sofa, he shifts to face Sydney, who is staring into the fireplace with a glazed look over her face.  
  
"So, that defector guy you and Vaughn brought back is a huge break for us…."  
  
"He sent you, didn't he?"  
  
"Sent me? Who sent me?"  
  
"Vaughn."  
  
"What are you talking about? I haven't been by to see you in awhile and we're friends, so here I am."  
  
"Weiss…you can't play me. It's my job to read body language and look for tells. Believe me, you suck at deception."  
  
"Hey now – no need to get personal. Come on, I read your debrief and it sounded like some pretty intense stuff. I thought you might appreciate an outlet."  
  
"An outlet, huh? And how much of what I 'let out' will be reported to a certain third party."  
  
"You mean the elephant in the room?"  
  
"Yeah – I keep trying to evict him, but just as I shove him out the door, he crawls back through the window."  
  
Weiss chuckles, "Now there's an interesting visual!"  
  
Sydney gives him a smile.  
  
"Hey, I think I saw a flash of the infamous Bristow dimples. I must be wearing down your defenses."  
  
Sydney looks down and the smile fades. Then she leans forward towards the tequila bottle again, but Weiss snatches it before she can grab it.  
  
"Hey – don't make me kick your ass!"  
  
"Syd, listen to me. I've already had to scrape one friend out of the bottom of a bottle. I'd rather not make that a habit."  
  
"I don't want to feel anything right now, Eric. I just want to be _numb_. I thought finding out about my two years – getting some answers after all these months of not knowing, would give me some closure. But instead, it's made my life even more screwed up – huh, like I even thought that was possible. I found out some things that I'm not ready to deal with…I may never want to."  
  
Weiss gets up and cleans the mess off the coffee table, then heads to the kitchen. Sydney's gaze returns to the fire. A few minutes later, Weiss returns with a cup of tea and hands it to her. She gives him the briefest of smiles, then accepts it gratefully. He sits down and cracks open a beer, then leans back and looks at her expectantly.  
  
"Hey, you know what? It's Sunday night and its almost 9. My favorite show comes on now on ABC."  
  
"Sydney, I think you're trying to railroad me. I ain't buying it."  
  
"Oh come on, we have all night to talk. Right now, I just want to escape. This show totally kicks! It's all about spies, but of course it's completely unrealistic. But the lead character is a totally kick ass chick, which almost never happens in prime time television. And her partner is so hot he could melt the TV screen, and they have all this UST between them because the government frowns upon 'fishing off the company dock.'"  
  
"UST – what the hell is that?"  
  
"Unresolved Sexual Tension."  
  
"Sounds like a communicable disease."  
  
"Come on, Eric. Watch with me, please? I'll catch you up on everything. Then afterwards…we can talk, if you want."  
  
"Well, okay. But only because I can't resist a begging drunk spywoman who could kill me with her pinky."  
  
"Thanks."

~~~~~

  
An hour, four beers and two cups of tea later…  
  
"Okay, now I'm really worried about you, Syd. You know _way_ too much about this show. You said its in its fifth season now? Which means you've missed two years of it – how do you still know what's going on?"  
  
"God bless DVD box sets. I've got the first four seasons on DVD."  
  
Sydney grabs the empty beer bottles and her mug, then heads into the kitchen. Weiss follows her and sits on a stool at the kitchen island. Sydney tosses the empties and places the mug in the sink. She then turns around, leans back against the sink and crosses her arms, as if she can protect herself from the conversation she is about to have. Weiss returns her gaze and gives her a small smile – trying to reassure her in some way.  
  
Sydney looks at the floor and lets out a heavy sigh.  
  
"Before I say anything, I need you to be honest with me. Did Vaughn ask you to come check on me?"  
  
Weiss hesitates a moment, then looks down as well. "Yeah, he did." He looks back at her. "But I had already planned on coming over, I swear! I know you and I know him. I've been around your relationship from the beginning. Reading that debrief and seeing you guys walk into JTF with the defector – it was obvious that something went down. At least it was obvious to me."  
  
"What exactly did he tell you?"  
  
"Syd – I came here as a friend who cares about you. I want you to use me as a sounding board – a friendly ear to spill your guts to. I'm not going to be your source of information about Vaughn, at least not when it comes to what he says about you. And I told him the same thing. Eventually, you guys will have to talk to each other."  
  
Sydney looks up at him and snickers a little. "You're like the CIA's very own Dr. Phil."  
  
"But with more hair, of course."  
  
"Of course."   
  
"Now, if you're asking me whether or not he told me about something that happened in North Korea, but did not appear in one of his 'Tolstoy-long' debriefs, then the answer is yes. He told me that he tried to tell you…something…then you said you already knew…and then you kissed."  
  
Sydney put her right hand over her eyes and pushed on them, trying to prevent the eruption of tears she could feel threatening to pour out. When she pulled her hand away and looked back at Eric with her watery eyes, he was respectfully looking down and playing with a pot holder. After a moment, he met her gaze.  
  
"I have another question. How much did Kendall tell you and Vaughn about my missing two years before we went to Patagonia?"  
  
"Not very much really. He said you had been brain-washed by the Covenant into believing you were Julia Thorne. And that while they had you, they extracted some of your eggs, because of your role in the Prophecy regarding Rambaldi. He said we needed to get to Patagonia ASAP and retrieve the Cube and your…well, you know. There wasn't much time for further explanation. Vaughn about blew a gasket when he tried to question Kendall further about your missing two years and baldy told him it was 'classified.' He almost wasn't allowed to go, but I think Kendall was afraid he'd go whether he approved it or not."  
  
"Eric, what I'm about to tell you…you have to _promise me_ that you will not say a word to _anyone_ about it. I mean ANYONE."  
  
"I promise…but you're kind of scaring me. What happened?"  
  
Sydney takes a slow deep breath, then starts to speak in a voice barely above a whisper.  
  
"It is true that I was taken by the Covenant. They extracted pulp from my teeth and injected it into the teeth of…Fran..Francie's corpse. That is why the DNA results showed the body as being me."  
  
"SHIT!"  
  
"Oh, it gets worse. When I woke up a couple of days later, I was strapped down in the back of a van with duct tape across my mouth. That doctor was there…Oleg – the guy I killed in Frankfurt soon after I returned to the field. He injected me with a neuro-inhibitor…some sort of temporary paralysis drug. He adjusted the gurney I was strapped to and raised me up, so that I could watch…my own funeral."  
  
"Shit! Shit! And double-shit!"  
  
"Nice vocabulary you got there, Weiss. Thankfully, I still don't actually have those memories, but this is the story that I told Kendall."  
  
"Wait – when YOU told Kendall? He knew you were alive? You were in contact with him?"  
  
"Slow down. I'm getting to that. For six months or so I was subjected to every possible form of brain-washing technique out there – they probably invented a few new ones for me. But it is impossible to brainwash me."  
  
"Syd, I know you are one hell of a spy, but don't you think that's a little cocky for even you to say?"  
  
"Oh, it has nothing to do with me, really. Did Vaughn ever tell you about Project Christmas?"  
  
"Yeah. That your dad used you as a guinea pig and you got really pissed off when you found out he turned you into a spy at the ripe old age of six."  
  
"Well, I guess I should thank him for that now, because Project Christmas hard-wired me with a failsafe. I am actually impervious to brain-washing."  
  
"Wow…I don't know what to say to that."  
  
"It takes a little while for it all to sink in. Anyway, I guess I eventually started to play along with their little game and let them believe that I was brain-washed. About nine months after I…died, I escaped from the Covenant and contacted Kendall."  
  
"WHAT!!!! Kendall knew you were alive?"  
  
"Yeah – Dixon, too."  
  
"WHAT!!!! Oh, Sydney….no, no, no…this is all wrong. Why didn't you come back? Where have you been since then?"  
  
"Whoa, whoa! Slow down, Eric. I met Kendall in a safe house in Tuscany and told him the story of what I have told you so far. The CIA, FBI, NSC – nobody knew much about the Covenant at that point in time. He wanted me to continue the charade, but I wanted to come home to my dad…and to Vaughn."  
  
"Oh, Syd…I don't like where this is going. Did you…did you come back?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Oh my God…"  
  
"I saw Vaughn getting out of his car outside a restaurant. I was just about to get out, when I saw he wasn't alone. He was…with Lauren…and I…I guess I…saw them kiss and go inside."  
  
"Oh no…this is wrong in _so_ many ways. Syd, you have got to tell Vaughn this and I mean ASAP!"  
  
"No, you need to let me finish. I haven't told anyone this, Eric. I need to get it out. After they entered the restaurant, I saw two men pull up and look towards Vaughn's car and towards the restaurant. Then one of them seemed to be reporting to someone via a comm in his ear, then they drove off. Vaughn was being watched…they knew that he would be the first person I would come looking for."  
  
"Sydney, I'm going to say it again…you have GOT to tell Vaughn about this!"  
  
"Eric, do you realize how many people who have been close to me and then have either died or had their lives ruined because of me? I couldn't let that happen to Vaughn. I love him so much that I had to let him go…I mean, I _loved_..him so much. I called Kendall from the car and agreed to be a double agent…again. I passed information to the CIA, while seemingly following the Covenant's orders as Julia Thorne."  
  
Weiss stands up and goes over to Sydney. He wraps her in a big bear hug and strokes the back of her hair. Sydney tries to stay tough for about a second, then she lets loose. A torrent of pain and tears come crashing down and she nearly collapses in his arms.  
  
"Hey, hey now. Shhhh." Weiss continues to hold her upright, letting her break down. "I think that is enough for tonight. You need to get to bed and get some sleep. Are you suppose to go in to work tomorrow?"  
  
Choking out between sobs, she says, "No. Dixon told me to take a couple of extra days. He knew that I needed to deal with some things."  
  
"Good, good. Now, I'm going to get you to bed, then I'm going to just crash on your couch, if you don't mind. I don't want you to be alone tonight. I'll call in tomorrow and talk to Dixon, let him know that I'm taking care of you. Then we can finish this up in the morning, if you want to."  
  
Sydney takes a step back and looks up at him. "Eric, I don't know what I'd do without you. Thank you…just…thank you."  
  
She gives him a tight squeeze, then they both turn towards the darkened hallway, Weiss with his arm around her shoulders and Sydney with her arm around his waist.  
  
"Just don't get any funny ideas in the middle of the night. The Weiss-man is not looking to be your love muffin."  
  
Sydney gives him a wet, dimpled grin and slaps at his arm.  
  
"Ow. That kind of hurt!"


	3. A Call and a Cry in the Night

**Chapter 3:** A Call and a Cry in the Night  
  
_Ring………ring………ring………ring._ Click, "You've reached the House of Weiss. Sing me a song at the beep." _Beeeeeeeep__._  
  
"Weiss! This is the _fourth_ time I've called you tonight! You were suppose to call me back after you went to see Syd! So help me God…if you got plastered and passed out on the couch…..ugh!!! Anyway, it is now 1:30 a.m. Call me AS SOON AS YOU GET THIS MESSAGE!!!!"  
  
Vaughn stops his pacing and clicks the "off" button on the cordless phone, but he doesn't put the phone down. Lauren had gone to bed hours ago, but he is wide awake and renews his pacing of the living room floor, the late night Sportscenter loop playing softly on the TV in the background, and waits for Eric to call.  
  
"Screw this. I'm calling his cell," he says to himself.  
  
_Ring……ring……ring._  
  
"Hello?" A very sleepy and slurred voice answers.  
  
"WEISS! Where the hell are you? I've been calling your house repeatedly! You were suppose to call me when you got back from seeing Syd."  
  
"Mike…dude…_chill_…and please, talk softer. I haven't left Sydney's yet."  
  
Vaughn stops pacing. "What? What do you mean you haven't left yet – it's 1:30 in the morning! [pause] Wait…I'm not 'interrupting' anything…am I?" A slow and steady boil begins to rise up Vaughn's torso as images of Naked!Sydney and Naked!Will flash through his head briefly, which are then replaced with Naked!Sydney and Naked!Weiss. A wave of nausea flows over him. His right hand balls into a fist as his left grips the phone tighter.  
  
Weiss, hearing his friend's jagged breathing, chuckles for a moment and sits up on the couch. "Hey now, back off tiger! I'm not _that_ kind of friend and Sydney's not _that_ kind of crazy. If that had been a risk, you wouldn't have sent me over here in the first place."  
  
Loosening his grip, his breathing slows and a crooked grin appears on his face. "Good point." He waits a moment as the nausea subsides, then asks, "So…why are you still there? She's okay, isn't she?"  
  
Weiss rakes a hand through his hair and lets out a sigh. "She will be, though God knows how since she's essentially been through all of Dante's levels of hell and purgatory. But she's Syd…she's Wonder Woman, Buffy and James Bond all rolled up in one."  
  
"So, does that mean that she talked to you? You know, about stuff?"  
  
"Smooth, Romeo. I'm sticking with my original disclaimer, which, by the way, I gave to Sydney as well. I'll be your Dr. Phil, Oprah, Barnett…whatever, but consider everything said to be under the Weiss/Patient Confidentiality Clause. I will say this though – you two HAVE GOT to talk. There is more going on than we ever imagined…I can't get any more specific, so just trust me on this."  
  
"That bad, huh?"  
  
"Listen, I only got half the story before I made her stop and put her to bed. I didn't feel right leaving her alone after all that gut-spilling, so I'm crashing on the couch. Dixon gave her a couple of days off and I'm calling in tomorrow so I can stay with her. She needs to get this all out…"  
  
Just then, a blood-curdling scream comes from Sydney's bedroom, followed by the sounds of thrashing and crying. Weiss jumps up and rushes towards her room, while still talking to Vaughn. "Shit! Mike, I gotta go…"  
  
"Weiss! What's happening? Was that Syd? Weiss…don't hang up! Please, let me speak to her!!"  
  
Weiss busts through Sydney's door to find her thrashing violently from side to side in her bed. Her eyes are still closed, but tears are streaming down her face and she is screaming and crying at the same time.  
  
"WEISS! What's going on? Is she okay? Damn it, let me talk to her!"   
  
Vaughn's voice was rising, which causes the other occupant of his apartment to wake up. Lauren hears Vaughn's agitated yelling, so she quietly slips out of bed and walks over to their bedroom door. She slowly opens it just wide enough to see Vaughn periodically walk into view as he paces back and forth in the living room. _Hmmm, something must be going on with __Sydney__. Nothing else gets Michael riled up like that._ Fearful that he might notice the open door, she hurries over to her briefcase and opens it. Inside, she lifts the various files and pulls back the bottom lining to reveal a small, flat pouch sewn into the bottom. Inside the pouch she pulls out a long thin cord with a mic on one end and a plug on the other. She closes up her briefcase, then retrieves a receiver unit from her purse, along with an earpiece with a wire. After putting them all together, she goes back to the door and shuts it gently, then kneels down on the floor and pushes the mic end of the cord underneath the door and aims it towards the living room. She puts in the earpiece and turns on the receiver. _Now we'll see what has my dear, devoted husband all in a tizzy._  
  
Weiss stands next to Sydney's bed, fearful of waking her…but really he's more afraid that if he touches her she's going to clock him. He whispers to her, "Sydney…Sydney wake up. You're dreaming, Syd. Wake up!"  
  
On the other end of the phone, Vaughn is holding his breath as he listens to the screaming and thrashing in the background, while Weiss tries to gently wake her. He starts to sweat and he runs his fingers through his hair repeatedly, wishing he was there instead of Weiss.  
  
Weiss speaks a little louder to her now, "Sydney, come on…wake up. You're scaring the Weiss-Man, and I don't scare easy."  
  
Sydney stops thrashing, then sits up suddenly with her eyes wide open and she cries out, "Vaughn? Oh my God, Vaughn!"  
  
Vaughn stops pacing. "Weiss, tell her I'm on the phone. Ask her if she wants to speak to me."  
  
Weiss kneels down by her bedside and Sydney looks over at him, breathing heavily with tears still streaming down her face and a confused expression. Weiss points at the phone and gently says, "Syd, I've got Vaughn on the phone. Do you want to speak to him?"  
  
She nods vigorously. Weiss hands her the phone, then stands up and walks out of her room, softly closing the door behind him. She clutches the phone to her chest and takes a few deep breaths, then puts the phone to her ear. "Vaughn?" Her voice is barely above a whisper.  
  
"Yeah, baby…it's me. Sounds like you're having a rough night." His voice is gentle and soothing. Lauren's eyes narrow and she crosses her arms, a slow anger building inside of her as she listens.  
  
Sydney sniffs and wipes away at the tears streaming down her face. His voice is like a warm and safe cocoon being wrapped around her. "Yeah, I guess you could say that. Did…did Weiss call you?" Her voice is raspy and weak.  
  
"Actually, I had called him to…uh…" _I guess there's no point in lying now, not when she's in this state. _"I was calling him to see if he had been to see you. I wanted to know how you were doing."  
  
Sydney glances over at the clock, which now reads "1:57" – she shakes her head back and forth a few times. "Vaughn, it's almost 2 o'clock in the morning. You couldn't wait until morning to talk to Eric?" Her voice is getting stronger and she leans back against her headboard, slowly reclaiming her sanity and her strength.  
  
Vaughn rubs his hand across his forehead a few times then down his face to his stubbly chin. _Busted! _"Well, I'm just…I was just worried about you."  
  
"That's not your job anymore."  
  
The words drive through Vaughn's heart like a serrated knife. "Syd, please…tell me what's going on. Were you having a nightmare? Were you having a…memory?" Lauren's ears perk up at that last question. She wonders if she could pick up the bedroom phone without detection, but knows that is too great of a risk.  
  
Vaughn listens to the silence on the other end, his heart sinking further with each passing second. "Syd…please. I need to know that you're okay. I want to help you!"  
  
Sydney lets out a deep sigh. _I want so much to tell you, Vaughn, to make you understand. I want you to know everything and I want you to console me and hold me and…kiss me. But now is not the time. It may never be that time. _"I can't let you do that, Vaughn. You have other…responsibilities. You can't fill that role in my life anymore."  
  
Vaughn jumps to his feet, his own anger starting to build. "Dammit Sydney, don't shut me out again! You know that drives me crazy!"  
  
"Vaughn, calm down! I'm not shutting you out permanently…I just can't talk to you about this right now. Please…respect that. You need to let me deal with this…ON MY OWN."  
  
Vaughn begins pacing again. "No…I don't accept that. We're _partners _now, Syd. I need to know what's going on with you, because it may be something that could affect you in the field." He knew that was lame, but he is desperate for her to talk to him.  
  
Sydney smirks at his pathetic reasoning, but he has made her realize what she needs to do now. "I'm going to go see Dixon tomorrow…and I'm going to ask that he not send us out on missions together anymore." Sydney holds her breath, waiting for the explosion.  
  
Vaughn stops…stunned that she would even consider that. "WHAT?!!? Are you insane? No…no, no, no. You are NOT going to talk to Dixon about any such thing! Do you hear me?"  
  
"Good night, Vaughn." Click.


	4. Dixon and Syd's Talk

**Chapter 4:** Dixon and Syd's Talk  
  
Knock. Knock.  
  
"Come in."  
  
"Hey Dixon, thanks for seeing me."  
  
"Of course, Syd – though I wasn't suppose to see you at all for a couple of days at least. It must be pretty important for you to come in on your rare day off."  
  
Sydney gives Dixon a small smile as she comes inside his office and takes a seat across from his desk. She's wearing her running pants, an Everlast tank, and her hair is pulled back into a tight ponytail – she ran 5 miles this morning in an attempt to forget last night. But her run had only strengthened her resolve. _I just can't do it anymore. I can't keep going on these life or death missions with Vaughn! It's just too painful. Worse yet, it gives me the one thing I can't afford to have right now…hope. _  
  
It was those thoughts that had led her straight to the Joint Task Force offices and to Dixon's door. _Better to just get it over with – Vaughn will just have to deal. Heck, Lauren will probably thank me. _  
  
"I have a request to make."  
  
"Okay, Syd. What is it?"  
  
"When Vaughn rejoined the Agency shortly after I…resurfaced, you had asked if we wanted any 'special considerations.' At the time, I thought it wouldn't be necessary – that we could maintain our professional relationship regardless of our past…involvement. Now that I am being frequently partnered with him on ops, I realize that it would be best for both parties, as well as the CIA, if someone other than Vaughn were partnered with me on any future ops."  
  
"I see." Dixon ponders her statement for a moment. He then gets up from his chair and walks in front of his desk, coming to rest against the edge directly in front of Sydney. He waits for her to meet his gaze before he continues on. "When I got promoted to Director of our division some…10 months or so ago now, one of the first things I asked for was your complete file, as well as Agent Vaughn's."  
  
Sydney's eyes widen a bit in surprise at this statement.  
  
"You see, I knew all about your skills as an agent from being your partner for so many years at SD-6. But your skills as a _double-agent_ were beyond even what I could have imagined. Your ability to deceive the deceiver…to walk the fine line that existed between crippling SD-6, while at the same time still giving them enough good intel to prevent them from discovering you…I was astounded. But the most important thing that I learned from reading those files is that you and Agent Vaughn are nearly unstoppable as a team. The reason the Agency tolerated the blatant breaches of protocol you were both guilty of before your disappearance was because of the irrefutable proof that your instincts with regards to each other are dead on."  
  
Sydney looks down at her hands, letting out a sigh as she processes what he is telling her. "Dixon, while that may have been true in the past, the situation has changed."  
  
Dixon gives her a sympathetic smile. "Syd…it may help you to rationalize this decision you've made by leading yourself to believe that since your return you and Agent Vaughn don't work as well together – but you're wrong. Don't misunderstand what I'm saying – you are still a top notch agent and on your own you are still one of the best agents the CIA has ever seen. But partnered with Vaughn, you are the _best_."  
  
Sydney shakes her head. "How can you say that? The missions that Vaughn and I have been on since we've been back have not exactly been textbook. There have been plenty of errors made...close calls...instances where one or both of us have been made. Our partnership has not been as perfect as you are portraying it."  
  
Dixon gives Sydney a nod. He stands up and reaches over to pat her shoulder, then he goes to sit behind his desk again. He leans forward and looks Sydney in the eye. "Syd, the best agents are not the ones who follow their orders to a 'T', encounter no obstacles, and fulfill their missions without a hitch. The _best_ agents, the 'best of the best', are those agents that have _everything_ go wrong, are forced to improvise…think on their feet, or are even made, but still complete their mission and get out alive. From reading your files, it was obvious that you and Agent Vaughn fell into that 'best of the best' category."  
  
Sydney breaks his eye contact and looks back down at her hands. She's flattered that Dixon thinks so highly of her abilities, but can tell that she is losing her argument. Sydney hates to lose.  
  
"That assessment has not changed since you both have returned. When you were on that operation in Munich, Agent Vaughn just happened to be in the rotunda. He noticed something that the rest of us, myself included, didn't see on the blueprint of the facility and he got you the correct intel. The same thing happened when you were in Mexico, when he noticed the enemies earpieces. Both times Vaughn grabbed a com and gave you instructions, and both times you followed his instructions without question. Syd, I worked with you for years…we were _partners_ for years, and I'm not sure that we ever had that kind of instantaneous 'sixth sense' about each other. What you and Agent Vaughn have…professionally…is rare. I'm sorry, Sydney, but I am going to have to deny your request."  
  
Sydney stands up quickly and starts to pace. "Dixon…I am speaking to you now as my friend. I am pleading with you – I just don't think I can take one more life or death mission with Vaughn!" She stops in front of his desk, arms crossed and on the verge of tears. She gives Dixon a long look before saying in a hoarse whisper, "There's too much between us…things are said in moments like those…its _too_ much. Please, Dixon…please?"  
  
Dixon stands up and walks over to Sydney, placing his hands on either side of her and grasping her upper arms firmly as he says, "Sydney, you may not believe this, but I'm denying your request for your own good. Our objective right now is to take down the Covenant. You are our best operative, which means you will be on point for at least 90% of the missions. In my current position, I am not able to accompany you on missions anymore. If it's not going to be me, then it's going to be the best – the best for you is Agent Vaughn. Whatever issues that have come up between you two have not affected the outcome of your missions, so I do not have a definitive reason to approve your request."  
  
Sydney gives Dixon a half-hearted nod. He, in turn, pulls her into a hug and continues, "Now, as your friend, I need to remind you that you have only been back for a few months, and are only a week or so past finding out what happened during the past two years of your life. I believe that your issues with Vaughn will dissipate with time – more so than with avoidance."   
  
He pulls back and looks into her teary-eyes. She can see the sincerety in his eyes. "You're probably right. Maybe I just don't have the right amount of perspective at this point in time. Thanks for listening to me. It means a lot." She gives him one more quick hug, then heads towards the door.  
  
"I'll see you in a couple of days, Sydney." She gives him a glance and a smile, then leaves.  
  
_Syd, if you only knew how much Vaughn really loves you. The sacrifices he has made for you and because of you amaze even me. There is no one else that I would trust your life with right now, and regardless of the current pain you are enduring, you will know the truth one day soon. Sooner, if I can help it._   
  
Dixon buzzes his secretary.  
  
"Yes, sir?"  
  
"Please tell Agent Vaughn that I'd like to see him as soon as possible in my office."  
  
"Right away, sir."  
  
"Thank you." _Kendall__ could probably get me fired for this, but he doesn't understand how Sydney and Vaughn work like I do._


	5. Vaughn's Story

**Chapter 5:** Vaughn's Story  
  
Vaughn had woken up in a terribly grouchy mood that morning. After Sydney hung up on him the night before, Vaughn had thrown the phone against the couch in anger and continued his pacing of the living room floor. After about ten minutes, he thought that he had heard movement coming from the bedroom. Realizing that Lauren must have woken up sometime during his phone conversation, he sat on the couch, putting his head in his hands as he ran through everything he had said to Weiss and Sydney. Once he was satisfied that he had not revealed anything damaging, he let out an exasperated sigh and headed towards the bedroom. As he slid underneath the covers, he glanced at Lauren as she pretended to be asleep. He knew that she was faking it, because her breathing pattern is different when she is truly sleeping. Though physically he was crawling into bed with this woman who he had been assigned to marry, his heart and mind were a couple of miles away…with the woman that he was madly in love with.  
  
After a fitful night, Vaughn got up early and went for a run. As he ran, he thought about that day almost two years ago that had both saved his life and ruined it at the same time. The day he had agreed to go deep cover.  
  
Flashback  
  
_"Thanks for coming in Agent…I mean, Mr. Vaughn. I hope it wasn't too much of an inconvenience for you."  
  
Vaughn was sitting in a chair across from Director Kendall's desk, the owner of which was currently leaning against said desk with his arms crossed and looking at Vaughn with a somewhat concerned expression. This expression was probably due to the younger man's appearance: Vaughn was wearing a crumpled and worn out pair of jeans with a dark t-shirt, neither of which looked particularly clean. A well worn pair of brown hiking boots and an Army surplus coat completed his ensemble. But it was the man himself, rather than his attire, that was the most disconcerting to __Kendall__. Vaughn's face hadn't seen a razor blade in at least a couple of months, and his hair was three or four inches longer than __Kendall__ had ever seen him wear it. It was sticking up in all directions and __Kendall__ doubted whether it had seen a brush or shampoo in a few days. The trademark forehead wrinkles were now a permanent fixture and his eyes were bloodshot with considerable bags underneath them. When he had first entered the room, __Kendall__ had caught a wiff of stale alcohol. The man before him was more likely to be mistaken for a homeless man than for the former top notch CIA agent that he really was.  
  
"I take it that it was important, considering the fact that you had Weiss scouring all of __Europe__ for me." Vaughn's voice was worn and ragged, the after effects from too much drinking and too much time spent in smoky bars. "Does it have something to do with __Sydney__'s murder?"  
  
"No…not exactly. That's not why I called you here."  
  
"Well then, why am I here?"  
  
"There are a couple of reasons. A month or so ago, the NSC started deposing everyone in the office regarding our dealings with Irina Derevko, in a effort to try and glean some new leads. You were a part of this task force during Derevko's stay here, so they would like to depose you as well."  
  
Vaughn ran his hand through his hair and then locked eyes with __Kendall__ for a moment. "NSC could have sent someone to __Europe__ after I was located and deposed me there. Why was it necessary for me to come here?"  
  
__Kendall__ reached behind him and picked up a folder off of his desk. He flipped through its contents until he reached what he was looking for – it was a photo. He handed the photo to Vaughn. "The woman in this photograph is Lauren Reed. She is the NSC agent who has been deposing each one of us regarding Derevko. She is also the daughter of Senator Reed from __Virginia__."  
  
Vaughn looked at the photo, confusion still being expressed on his face. "Okay…I still get the feeling that there is a point to all of this. What does Ms. Reed have to do with me?"  
  
"Well, you see Mr. Vaughn, the CIA was not the only ones who have been trying to find you. Two months ago we intercepted a transmission through Echelon that was between a high ranking member of a group known as the Covenant, and one of their stateside operatives. You were mentioned by name in this transmission."  
  
"Me? Who is the Covenant and what do they want with me?"  
  
"First of all, you need to know that the Covenant is currently our prime suspect in the investigation of Agent Bristow's murder."  
  
"What? What about Sloane? Is he involved with them? I've never even heard of them – why would they have wanted to murder __Sydney__?"  
  
"We are still trying to figure that out. But right now, you need to know that the communicae we intercepted made mention of a plan for a Covenant mole located deep within the U.S. Government to locate you, seduce you and eventually to marry you."  
  
"Wait, wait. A 'swallow' mission? But I'm not even with the CIA anymore! And I sure as hell am not looking to get involved with anyone…not so soon after Syd…maybe not EVER. This just doesn't make any sense, and I still don't get what this has to do with this woman." Vaughn waves the photo of Lauren at __Kendall__.  
  
"After we intercepted that transmission, the whole task force was put on alert to report any suspicious questions that came out of the blue regarding your whereabouts or anyone who asked questions about you period. A few weeks later, the NSC reopened the Derevko investigation under the guise of looking for new leads on her location. The depositions were conducted by Ms. Reed and most of them were by the book, covering the basics of relaying our contact with Ms. Derevko while she was in our custody and the details of her escape. But two of the depositions she conducted made obvious turns away from protocol after the basic questioning regarding Derevko. In her depositions with Jack Bristow and Agent Weiss, Ms. Reed veered off her normal line of questioning and started asking specific details relating to you and your relationship with __Sydney__. Due to the directive issued regarding any questions that were asked about you, Agents Bristow and Weiss came to me and we held a meeting to determine whether Ms. Reed was the one sent by the Covenant."  
  
"You suspect the Senator's daughter as being the mole?"  
  
"Well, we knew that we were treading on thin ice when it comes to an accusation like that. Our next steps had to be cautious ones. We decided that the best course of action would be to locate you and allow Ms. Reed to depose you. You will be wired during your deposition and then we will determine whether or not she is the one."  
  
"Kendall, you may or may not have noticed this, but I am not exactly in the proper state of mind to be subjected to a deposition that will force me to talk about my father's murderer, and quite possibly the murder of my girlfriend. You should have just let me stay in __Europe__ and away from all of this. It's doubtful that they would have ever found me."  
  
"And just let you drink yourself to death?" Vaughn dropped his eyes from __Kendall__'s glare. "Mr. Vaughn, you may not currently be in the employ of the CIA, but when you were here, you were an exemplary agent. You suffered an incredible loss and instead of choosing to fight back or get revenge, you have chosen to drink yourself to death and avoid anyone and anything having to do with __Sydney__. What you are doing now is not honoring her memory. Is this how you think she would want you to be handling her death? By seeing how fast you can join her?"  
  
"You don't know what you're talking about…I died the moment I threw her ashes out to sea. All you see now is the shell that remains."  
  
"What I am giving you now, Mr. Vaughn, is a reason to keep on living. Not in spite of __Sydney__, but because of her…in honor of her. If we determine that Ms. Reed is indeed the Covenant mole, my directive will be for you to consider taking on a deep cover assignment."  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
"I would want you to encourage a relationship with Ms. Reed, including marrying her at some point, and provide intel to the CIA regarding her activities, contacts, anything you can get regarding the Covenant. We have little to no information on them right now. If you truly want justice…if you truly want to avenge Sydney's murder, then the best way to do that is to help us take down the Covenant."  
  
"I could never consider prostituting myself…that's just not something that I could ever do."  
  
"Not even for __Sydney__?"  
  
"She wouldn't want me to do that…"  
  
"What do you think she did after her fiancée was killed? She kept going and then she decided to make SD-6 pay. She was essentially in bed with the enemy, and she eventually was successful."  
  
"Let me…let me think about it."  
  
"Your deposition with Ms. Reed is scheduled for two days from now. Get cleaned up, shave, get a haircut. Do whatever you need to have the appearance of normalcy. After the deposition, we'll review the recording and make a decision then. But Vaughn, you need to understand that for this to be a believable deep cover, you will not be allowed to review the true nature of your relationship with Ms. Reed to anyone besides me."  
  
"Not even Weiss? Or Jack? They may become suspicious, since they were told about a possible mole."  
  
"Especially not them. If we determine that it is her, then I will let everyone know that the original intel we received was false or that we had thwarted it in some other way. The fewer people who know about this, the less likely your cover will be blown."  
  
__Kendall__ stood up and Vaughn joined him. They shook hands and Vaughn headed for the door. "Remember Agent Vaughn – you are to tell no one about this."  
  
"Yes, sir."_  
  
End Flashback  
  
Vaughn had finished his run and was taking a shower while he finished thinking about that day. While the idea of doing a 'raven' mission was at first preposterous to him, the more he thought about it…the more sense it made to him. He had not been honoring Sydney's memory by hustling pool halls all across Europe, while trying to drink his memories away. He accepted the mission and resumed his life in L.A. He took on a teaching job that Kendall had arranged, thus preventing Vaughn from having any significant intel that Lauren could intercept. The relationship moved along quickly, and Vaughn was surprised at how supportive Jack, Eric, and Dixon had been to his moving on so quickly. The reason why the Covenant had chosen Vaughn in the first place did not become clear until Sydney resurfaced.

Vaughn is rushing through the rest of his morning routine, desperate to get to JTF before Sydney has a chance to see Dixon. He starts to shave and his mind wanders back to that fateful day when he found out that Sydney was still alive.  
  
Flashback  
  
_Vaughn was standing up while stacking quiz papers at his desk as the remainder of the students from his last class filed out. He heard someone clear their throat and looked up to see __Kendall__ standing in the back of the room. Vaughn was surprised to see him, since he had been reporting to Director Dixon for the past six months. He had been told that __Kendall__ was overseeing a top secret mission that needed his full attention, and Vaughn hadn't seen him since.  
  
"There's been a development in __Sydney__'s case."  
  
Vaughn froze – there was something about __Kendall__'s demeanor that sent a chill up his spine. "Really? What's that?"  
  
"She's alive."  
  
Vaughn's mouth dropped open. His lips went numb. The numbness spread up his cheeks, past his eyes and to his forehead. His whole face was tingling. His throat started burning and a wave of nausea hit him like a freight train. He leaned to the left side of his desk and vomited into his trash can – the entire contents of his stomach spilling forth in wave after wave. Kendall took a few steps forward, then stopped – not quite sure how close he should get until Vaughn had thoroughly processed the bomb he had just dropped. Eventually the hurling slowed to dry heaves. Vaughn grabbed some tissues off of his desk and wiped his mouth. The numbness remained though and he felt like he was on the verge of collapsing into a heap on the floor. He looked disbelievingly at __Kendall__, then sank into his chair – elbows on his knees, head falling into his hands. "How…how is that possible? I BURIED her! Where has she been? Where is she now?"  
  
__Kendall__ put his hands on his hips and took a few more steps forward before he spoke. "Agent Vaughn – we have very few answers right now. I can tell you that two hours ago I received a phone call from Agent Bristow from a pay phone in __Hong Kong__. I directed her to the nearest safehouse, where she arrived an hour ago. We believe that she has no memory of the past two years."  
  
Vaughn's head jerked up and he met __Kendall__'s gaze. "What did you just say?"  
  
"__Sydney__ does not remember the time that she was missing."  
  
"Oh my God…."  
  
"An investigation has been started, but first and foremost we need Agent Bristow transported safely back to __L.A.__ as soon as possible. Due to her apparent memory loss, it was determined that you should be the one to retrieve her."  
  
Vaughn shook his head a couple of times. He squeezed his eyes shut as he began to realize the enormity of this development. "Wait…why me? Why not Jack? No one but you and __Dixon__ even know that I'm still with the CIA."  
  
"Jack Bristow is not available at this time. I can't discuss any further details regarding him. You and Sydney were close – you were from her life before and she trusts you. This has to be handled with the utmost care. I'm sure you can understand that."  
  
Vaughn looked at his hands. Just then a ray of sunlight from the classroom window reflected off the gold band on the ring finger of his left hand. "I can't…I can't go see her! Not until you pull me out of my assignment! I need time to wrap this up so I can explain to her what's going on – why I've done what I've done. Why I'm married to someone else!!!"  
  
"Agent Vaughn – __Sydney__'s reappearance does not affect your mission. It does not equate to the dismantling of the Covenant. You will remain under deep cover and finish your assignment as per our agreement."  
  
"No…no, no, no!!! You can't ask me to do that – not to __Sydney__! She may have been brainwashed…tortured…GOD KNOWS WHAT! You want me to go see her… then tell her that I met someone else and got married in less than two years after she disappeared? She's going to kick my ass! She's going to think that I gave up on her…that I got over her…that I don't still…love her…" Vaughn's voice fades as images of Sydney's face in various contortions of anger, rage, despair and disappointment flash through his mind.  
  
Kendall walked up to Vaughn's desk and leaned forward, resting his knuckles on the desktop as his glare bores into the younger man's glazed-over eyes. "Your mission is the same now as it ever was – but instead of revenging __Sydney__'s murder, you are now helping to bring to justice the ones who stole two years of her life…and now your life as well. You are still honoring her. This assignment is crucial to our efforts to keep tabs on the Covenant and to bring about their eventual downfall. When this is all over, Agent Bristow will understand that you were doing your duty…to your country and to her as well. I know it may seem impossible, but this is for the best."  
  
Vaughn sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. He was unbelievably thrilled that __Sydney__ was not dead – she was still living and breathing. But he also knew that she would want answers and if it was the Covenant that had her, then he was in the best position to help provide those to her. He'd have to continue with this sham marriage – and he was going to have to break her heart, while breaking his all over again in the process. "If I am going to continue with this charade…for __Sydney__'s sake…then I am asking your permission to tell Agent Weiss what is going on. I need someone to talk to about this or I'm going to explode."  
  
"Permission granted." __Kendall__ picked a folder up off a nearby desk and handed it to Vaughn. "This is all we know at the moment. Go to __Hong Kong__. Bring her back. Then continue to work your ass off to bring down the Covenant once and for all." Kendall gave him a nod, then headed for the classroom door. At the door he turned around and looked at Vaughn, who was running his hand through his hair repeatedly. "I'm proud of you. Your patriotism in this endeavor is beyond comparison." Vaughn just stared at him.   
  
After __Kendall__ had left and he had had time to process everything, he realized now why the Covenant had chosen him. If they were the ones who had held __Sydney__, they needed to keep tabs on him to see whether or not Syd would ever try to contact him. They knew that she would seek him out the first opportunity she got. As he got up to leave for the airport, he picked up his secure cell phone and dialed a number. "Weiss, listen. I need to talk to you. Can you meet me at the airport?"_  
  
End Flashback  
  
Vaughn had finished breakfast, given Lauren a quick kiss on the cheek as he ran out the door with the excuse of an early meeting, and was just pulling into the parking garage. As he walks towards the elevator, he notices that Sydney's car is there already.   
  
"Damn it, Sydney!" He rushes up to the elevator and mashes the button. When the doors open, he comes face to face with the lovely Miss Bristow herself. She gives him a cold glare and starts to walk quickly towards her car. Vaughn rushes after her and closes her car door just after she opens it.  
  
"Back off, Vaughn. I want to go home." She keeps her back to him, trying not to notice the periodic whispers of warm air on the back of her neck that were coming from Vaughn's agitated breathing. He keeps his hand pressed against the top of the car door frame, preventing her from reopening it, while his other hand rests on his hip.  
  
"Did you talk to Dixon?" His breathing is slowing somewhat as he tries to calm himself.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Well, what did he say?"  
  
Slowly, Sydney turns around and leans back against her car door. She looks up at Vaughn, whose arm is still trapping her on one side and whose face is mere inches away. "He denied my request. Are you happy now? Does that give a nice little boost to your ego? It seems that my…torture…is not nearly as important as the _mission_. It's always got to be about the _mission_." Her voice sounds defeated.  
  
Vaughn looks down for a moment, then meets her eyes again. He can see a tear start to pool along the lower lid of her right eye, and he knows that his resolve will slip soon if he doesn't get away from her. He drops his arm and takes a step back. Sydney breaks eye contact, then slowly gets into her car. As she starts to drive away, she gives him one last look…just in time to see him mouth the words, "I'm sorry."


	6. Dixon & Vaughn's Talk

**Chapter 6:** Dixon & Vaughn's Talk  
  
After Vaughn's encounter with Sydney, he went back to the elevator and entered the JTF rotunda. Just as he reaches his desk, his phone rings. "This is Vaughn."  
  
"Hello, Agent Vaughn. Director Dixon would like to speak with you, if you have a moment."  
  
"Uh, yeah…sure. I'll be right there."  
  
"Thank you. I will let him know."  
  
Vaughn stands up and walks towards Dixon's office. _Well, I know he's not reassigning me, so I wonder what this is about._ He gets to Dixon's door and knocks politely.  
  
"Come in."  
  
Vaughn opens the door and pokes his head in. "You wanted to see me, sir?"  
  
"Yes, Agent Vaughn. Please come in and have a seat." Dixon gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk, and Vaughn complies. Dixon stares at him for a moment, then gives him a small smile before he continues. "Sydney came in to see me…bright and early this morning." He notices that Vaughn does not seem surprised by this revelation. "Do you know why she was here?"  
  
Vaughn nods his head and says simply, "Yes." Dixon glares at him, expecting him to continue. After a moment, he does. "She asked not to go on anymore missions with me…she asked not to be my partner anymore." Vaughn's voice starts to crack with pent-up emotion. "I also know that you denied her request."  
  
Dixon raises his eyebrows, a bit surprised that he already knew that. "So…you have spoken to Sydney this morning?"  
  
"Yes. She was exiting the elevator in the parking garage as I was about to enter it. We spoke for a few moments, and then she left."  
  
"Can you give me an explanation as to why Sydney would make such a request?"  
  
Vaughn lets out a sigh, then swallows hard – not sure of how much to reveal. He doesn't want Dixon to change his mind. "I believe this was a result of our mission in North Korea."  
  
"Uh huh…" Dixon gives him a hard look, then asks, "Was there something that happened, but that did not get written down in your debrief? Because I don't recall anything in your report that would have prepared me for the conversation I had with Agent Bristow this morning."  
  
"Dixon…," Vaughn pleads, "…you are one of the few people who knows about my predicament. I intentionally left out a few things that could have potentially compromised my cover with Lauren."  
  
"Such as…?"  
  
_He's not going to let this go, is he? Crap!_ "Well, when Sydney…I mean, Agent Bristow and I were in the cell waiting for our executioners, I _attempted_ to express my true feelings for her, seeing as it was a 'life or death' situation. She…uh…wouldn't let me say the words, but told me that she already knew. Then, we…uh…we kissed."  
  
Dixon looks down for a moment. _Just as I suspected._ He gets up from his chair and walks over to the chair beside Vaughn, angling it towards the other agent as he leans forward, elbows on his knees and hands clasped together. Vaughn turns his chair slightly to face him as well. "Vaughn…your little revelation is not a big surprise to me. I've been amazed that you have been able to hold back for this long."  
  
Vaughn lets out a breath that he didn't know he was holding. Relief washed over his face when he realizes Dixon isn't angry with him. "When we survived, I knew that I still had a mission to fulfill. It tore me up inside, knowing that I had let my guard down with her, only to have to put the mask back on as soon as we got back. I was worried about her, so I asked Weiss to go check on her. I guess she told him some of the story regarding her missing years and she broke down. Weiss stayed with her last night and I think he is planning to stay there today, too."  
  
"Yes, I had a message from Agent Weiss that was left early this morning."  
  
"Anyway, Eric was suppose to call me after he checked on her. It got later and later, but he hadn't called. I finally got a hold of him on his cell phone, and while we were talking, Syd had a nightmare of some kind and was screaming. It scared me to death! Weiss woke her up and let me talk to her. When she calmed down, she put her own wall back up and shut me out. That's when she told me that she was going to ask to be reassigned."  
  
"I see…" Dixon sits back, contemplating what Vaughn has told him so far.  
  
"Dixon – I don't know what to do anymore! Jack had told me to be cruel to her, because my 'kindness tortures her' – and I tried that. Because of what happened in North Korea, she now knows that was an act. If I get too comfortable around her, then there is a danger of Lauren getting suspicious. God…each time I'm with her I just want to hold her…touch her…take away all the pain and anguish of everything she's been through. I'm trying to be strong…reminding myself that I'm doing this for her. But it is slowly _killing me_. Maybe Syd's right…maybe we just need to stay away from each other completely. I'm tired of causing her so much pain. She doesn't deserve that, and I think I'm making it worse for her."  
  
"I agree. But I have thought of a better way for you and Sydney to handle working together." Vaughn looks at Dixon – he's intrigued. Dixon stands up and walks slowly towards the other side of the room, his back to Vaughn, as he speaks, "Agent Vaughn, I think it would be in the best interest of both parties, as well as the Agency, for you to reveal your deep cover assignment to Sydney."  
  
Vaughn shakes his head, sure that he heard him wrong. He stands up and Dixon turns to face him. "What did you say?"  
  
"I said that you have my permission to tell Agent Bristow the truth about your marriage."  
  
"I don't understand. Kendall told me to maintain my cover at all costs. Did he agree to this?"  
  
"Kendall does not work out of this office anymore. Besides, I don't think Kendall has a true appreciation for you and Sydney's work relationship. I've read your file, Vaughn – and Syd's, too. That's what I told her this morning – that to bring down the Covenant, we needed the 'best of the best.' That means you and Sydney working together. To someone like Kendall, emotions and feelings can only hamper an agent. That may be true in most cases, but not when it comes to you and Syd. You two have a sixth sense about each other – you trust each other explicitly in the field. That's why you're able to be so successful on your missions, regardless of whatever obstacles are thrown your way. Right now, you are both trying to bury the feelings that made you so unstoppable in the first place. It is my belief that if you tell her the truth, and if she tells you the truth – you will both be able to reveal your true feelings again. Once that obstacle has been cleared, you can maintain your cover with Syd's support, rather than contributing to her pain."  
  
"Wait, you said Syd has to tell me the truth, too? About what…her two years? Do you know the story?"  
  
"There are additional factors that you are not aware of yet – just as Syd is not aware of yours. Trust me when I say that it needs to be Syd who tells you."  
  
"Okay…" Vaughn accepts this, then looks at the ground as he thinks about what Dixon has said. "My one fear is that once I reveal myself to Syd, what's going to prevent us from acting on those feelings?"  
  
"Agent Vaughn, I'm surprised at you. You worked a year and a half with Sydney with just one goal in mind – the take down of SD-6 and the Alliance. From what I've heard, the two of you didn't act on your obvious attraction to each other until the day the raids took place. Your desire to be together motivated you to take them down in record time! The same rules could be applied to your current situation. You and Sydney will be able to be seen together, but you will not be free to act on your feelings – one or both of you could be killed. You will maintain your cover, but now you will have Syd as your ally – together you will work to bring down the Covenant, so that you can be together again."  
  
Vaughn's face brakes out in a full-blown smile, dimples creased, at that last statement. He couldn't believe that Dixon was giving him the okay to tell Sydney! He reaches out and shakes his hand. "Dixon, I don't know how to thank you for this. You are saving my sanity!"  
  
"I'm just trying to look out for our girl." He gives Vaughn a lopsided grin. "Good luck, Michael. Remember though, there are two sides to this tale. You may need to wait until she is ready to talk as well."  
  
"Thank you, sir…you have no idea…."  
  
Dixon waves him out. "Get out of here – go talk to her. Take the day off, and I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
Vaughn stops with his hand on the door knob. "What should I tell Lauren?"  
  
"I'll tell her you're following a potential lead by researching the archives. Pick up some files from there on your way to Syd's. You can return them tomorrow."  
  
"Okay. Thanks again!" Vaughn practically skips out the door…and right into Jack Bristow.


	7. A Slip Up and a Run In

**Chapter 7:** A Slip Up and a Run In  
  
_ZZZzzzzzzzzz__…..  
  
Jingle, jingle…….creeeaaaaakkk…….SLAM!_  
  
"Wha…what the…?" Weiss sits up quickly from his slumber on the couch, eyes still half-closed, and grabs his gun off of the side table – aiming it towards the door.  
  
"Intruders don't normally use a key, Eric," Sydney says with a smirk. "Now put that gun away before I have to take you down."  
  
"Syd?" Eric asks groggily. He puts the gun down and rubs his eyes. "Where have you been?"  
  
Sydney drops her keys on the counter and heads to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of water. "I went for a run, then I ended up at JTF….I talked to Dixon."  
  
Weiss gets up and walks to the kitchen. He leans against the door frame. "Dixon? What'd you have to talk to him about?"  
  
Sydney gives her sleepy friend a once over then chuckles. "You're not a morning person, are you?" The response she receives closely resembles a death ray aimed in her direction. "Want some coffee?" She pulls a canister out of the cupboard.  
  
"Yes, please, now. You are a goddess." He takes a seat on the kitchen bar stool and watches Sydney as she gets the coffee started. When she's done, she grabs her water and joins Weiss on the stool next to him. He gives her a sideways glance. "Goddess or not, you are attempting to evade the Inquisition. So get with the confessing. What did you have to see Dixon about?"  
  
She takes a swig of her water and gives him a small smile. "I went to ask him to assign me a new partner for ops…well, actually, I told him that I did not want to go on any more operations _period_ with Vaughn."  
  
"You're kidding, right?" She raises her eyebrows and shakes her head. "Are you crazy? There's no way…wait a second, what did Dixon say?"  
  
Sydney's back stiffens somewhat as she replies, "He denied my request."  
  
"Well, of course he did! Honestly, Syd, I can't even fathom why you would make that kind of request. You and Vaughn are like…the Batman & Robin of CIA ops…you're like Captain & Tenille…Rocky & Bullwinkle…Han & Leia…"  
  
Sydney lets a snort escape at that last one. "I get your point, Weiss. But you're forgetting one very important detail. We use to be 'Syd & Vaughn' – but…we're not anymore. You _know_ what happened in North Korea. My life is full of insanity with no definitive end in sight. What happened to me…the aftershocks haven't even begun to spread out, much less dissipate."  
  
"I know what you're saying, Syd, but you and Vaughn still have a connection that is pretty powerful. Take last night for example…"  
  
Sydney interrupts him, "What happened last night is what drove me to see Dixon today. I can't keep depending on Vaughn…when he is not mine to depend on. With us, there is no line between 'personal' and 'professional.' The more dire the situation…the more likely that one of us is going to say or do something inappropriate. When stuff like that happens, my defenses come down and I see a glimmer of hope…I _can't_ allow myself to hope, Eric. Too many of my dreams have been shattered by that four-letter word."  
  
Eric stands up and pulls Sydney up with him. He envelops her in a big bear hug, then whispers in her ear, "Syd…there is always hope. You can't give up on Vaughn yet."  
  
As Sydney considers what he said, something clicks somewhere deep inside her and she pulls her head back quickly – forcing Eric to look her straight in the eyes. She glares at him just long enough for Weiss to feel like she's reading his mind. "What's going on, Weiss?"  
  
Just then, Eric's cell phone rings.  
  
Vaughn recovers himself from his near collision with the stoic statue that is Jack Bristow.  
  
"Agent Vaughn." His voice is already laced with accusation. "I would think that you would be a little bit more aware of your surroundings, being that you are an agent with the CIA. Perhaps a little more caution when you exit an office, rather than an inappropriate 'mad dash' would suit you in the future."  
  
Vaughn straightens himself up and squares his shoulders, bringing his arms in front of him where he places one hand over the other in a tight grip. _Even the formidable Jack Bristow isn't going to keep me from this mission. It's too important._ "Good morning to you, too, Jack. I apologize for bumping into you, but I have an urgent meeting to get to."  
  
Jack considers the man before him. This is a different Michael Vaughn than the one he has been witness to in the months since Sydney has returned. _Something has changed…something probably having to do with __Sydney__. Well, I'm going to have to take him down a notch before he rips her heart out…again._  
  
"Agent Vaughn, I suggest that you keep in mind the piece of advice that I gave you regarding your interactions with my daughter. I will not stand by and let you..."  
  
"Forget it, Jack. You can't scare me away from Sydney. There is too much history between us. There are some things that you don't understand...can't understand. You are just going to have to do the one thing that will probably be the most difficult for you to accept -- you're going to have to trust Sydney...and trust me."  
  
With that, Vaughn brushes past a stunned Jack and heads to his desk. He grabs his cell phone out of his inside coat pocket, then grabs his briefcase and heads for the elevators. Coming up with a plan of action, he dials Weiss while waiting for the elevator to arrive.  
  
_Ring…ring…_  
  
"Weiss…"  
  
Weiss backs away from Sydney and grabs his phone from the counter. "Sorry, Syd. This is probably important. You know, CIA agent and all." _Whew! Talk about being saved by the bell!_ "This is Weiss."  
  
"Hey man. You still at Syd's?"  
  
"Uh…yeah, what's up?" Sydney is studying Weiss's face, trying to determine who it is. Finally, she mouths the words, "Who is it?" Weiss shakes her off and holds a finger up, asking her to wait a minute.  
  
"Listen, don't tell Syd that it's me. I need you to come pick me up over at the Archives building. Make up something to tell Syd. I'll explain why when you get here."  
  
"Okay…yes, sir. I'll be right there." Weiss hangs up and gives Sydney a hesitant look. Her stare sends shivers up his spine and he gets a glimpse of the look she usually reserves for the bad guys. He doesn't like it. "Uh, I have to go…into the office for a little bit. I need to clarify part of a report I did for Dixon."   
  
Sydney still eyes him skeptically. "We need to finish our conversations – both this one and the one from last night." She knows that she struck something a few moments ago, and she is not going to let him back out of it. She wants some answers…now.  
  
"Yeah, sure. I shouldn't be gone long. You going to be okay here all by yourself." Sydney gives him a glare that could melt steel. "I'll take that as a 'yes, and I could drop kick you in a heartbeat.' I'll be back soon, then we can…uh…finish talking."


	8. The Pieces are Coming Together

**Chapter 8:** The Pieces are Coming Together…  
  
Weiss pulls into the parking garage at the CIA Archives building. He sees Vaughn approaching, so he gets out of the car.  
  
"Hey man, thanks for coming." Vaughn has a goofy kind of grin on his face, and Weiss eyes him warily.  
  
"Dude, where's your tie and jacket? And what are you doing at the Temple of Dust?"  
  
Vaughn snickers at the use of their private nickname for the Archives. He then grabs Eric's shoulder, still wearing the goofy grin, and says, "Today is the day, my friend. I'm going to tell Sydney the _truth_."  
  
Weiss looks at him in disbelief. "You're crazy…you can't blow your cover to Sydney! Kendall would be all over your ass like white on rice!!"  
  
Vaughn chuckles a little, then explains, "I talked to Dixon this morning and he gave me the okay. Despite how Kendall may feel about it, Dixon believes that telling Sydney can help us to bring the Covenant down sooner. He seems to remember a certain international crime syndicate being taken down in 'record time,' in large part due to the desire of Syd and me to be together. He thinks that we can work that to our advantage again."  
  
"The man's a genius. Seriously, MENSA should put him on their mailing list. So what's the plan?"  
  
"Well, I called Lauren a few moments ago to let her know that I would be here at the Archives all day following up a potential lead regarding the Covenant. If she gets curious and asks Dixon about it, he'll back me up. I'm leaving my car here…"  
  
"Because of the GPS tracker…"  
  
"Yeah, and I have left my suit jacket and tie in one of the lower archive rooms…"  
  
"Because of the trackers that Lauren puts on your clothes…"  
  
"Correct. I was swept this morning at JTF, as usual, and those were the only trackers on me. Now, I need you to drive me to Syd's, but we'll need to lose any tails, just in case. I have waited too long for this to risk anything going wrong." Vaughn gives Eric's shoulder a squeeze, then runs his hand through his hair.  
  
Weiss looks at his friend…his _best_ friend…who has suffered through so much. The man before him has sacrificed everything for love…he is a walking testament to the lengths that a man would go for a woman. _Dude…I hope I never fall in love._  
  
"Mike…I don't want to burst your bubble, but we're nowhere near the end of this. Even after you tell Sydney, you still can't be with her. You're still going to have to continue being married to Lauren."  
  
The smile on Vaughn's face finally fades. "I know that, Eric. But I can now be honest with Syd – that's the most important thing to me right now. It may not change the physical appearance of my situation, but it changes everything mentally and emotionally…for me and hopefully for her, too."  
  
Weiss gives him a quick nod and a smile. "Well, let's get to it, Romeo. Can't leave the little lady waiting any longer, can we?"  
  
Vaughn's smile makes a reappearance with full wattage. "No…no we can't." He and Weiss get into the car. "You know I'm going to tell her that you called her a 'little lady,' right?"  
  
"Your threats are meaningless to me, old man. That girl of yours, on the other hand…"  
  
They both laugh as they drive off.  
  
_Knock…knock._  
  
Sydney walks out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel, while continuing to rub her hair with another towel. "Just a second," she calls. _It's probably Weiss. Don't want to give him a heart attack._ She enters her bedroom and grabs a soft pink stretch camisole with thin straps and puts it on. After she puts on a pair of undies and some shorts and tosses the towels back into the bathroom, she walks over to the door and looks through the peep hole. _Just as I thought…_ She opens the door. "Hey, Weiss. Everything go okay with Dixon?"  
  
She starts to walk towards the kitchen, but he doesn't follow her. Instead, he stands in place and waits for her to turn around. "Syd…I can't stay."  
  
She stops and turns to look at him. She gives him a funny look with a smile and asks, "Why not? We're suppose to finish talking."  
  
"But it's not me that you are suppose to be talking to…" Weiss gives her a knowing look, then nods his head towards the back of the living room, where the sliding glass doors are.  
  
The smile fades and her body stiffens somewhat. Her face starts to tighten with emotion, preparing for what…or who…she will see over her shoulder. She crosses her arms tight around her front, then slowly turns. Vaughn is just outside the sliding glass doors, standing with his hands in his pockets and his head tilted down. But his eyes are raised towards her…begging her to let him in. Trying to quell the feelings rising up within her, she takes in a deep breath, then turns back to face Weiss…who is looking sheepishly towards the ground.  
  
"Why is he here?" Her voice is just above a whisper.  
  
"You need to talk to him…and not just about the stuff you were telling me. He has things that he needs to tell you as well. You need to trust me on this, Syd. Let him in…then let him talk. The answers you have been looking for are waiting just outside those doors." He gives her an encouraging look, then pulls her door shut and heads for his own place.  
  
Sydney stares at the closed door for a few moments, gathering her strength while trying to process what Weiss has just said to her. The one word that stands out the most is "answers." That word alone propels her to turn around and walk towards the glass doors. She stands there a moment and takes in the sight before her: This is Vaughn, of course, but something is different. He's wearing dark blue suit pants and a light blue oxford. The tie and jacket are missing, and the top button of his shirt is undone, revealing a peak at the white T-shirt beneath. He has the holster on, ever the Boy Scout that he is, but there is something more…something in his face…something in his eyes. _I know those eyes. This isn't the Vaughn I have been around since my return…this is…the old Vaughn…the one who was with me in the cell in North Korea…this is my Vaughn. _Her eyebrows shoot up and she lets out a small gasp at this realization. Some kind of veil has been lifted from his face.  
  
As Sydney is studying him, he is studying her as well. He is gazing at her intently…trying to will her with his eyes to open the door and let him in. Not just into her house, but back into her soul as well. _Come on, Syd…please trust me. Let me come in._ He notices that her long chestnut hair is damp and tousled, like it looks when she just gets out of the shower. He takes in the vision before him: Wet hair…face scrubbed clean and without a hint of makeup...tight pink tank that reveals her incredibly toned arms and abs…a tiny pair of grey shorts that show off her endless pair of legs…bare feet. _God…how am I going to be able to talk coherently with her looking like that? Easy, Mike…you've been trained to handle merciless acts of torture. She's got to hear the truth…then maybe she'll let me run my finger along her jaw line and kiss those precious lips and…_ Vaughn is pulled out of his reverie by the sound of the sliding glass door opening.  
  
"Come in."


End file.
